Daisy was playing with a block this morning and got a little fussy, so I said, “Do you want to snuggle a little bit?” I put her up on my shoulder, and she fell asleep in like 2 minutes. I guess she was tired!!
I was in heaven.
There’s nothing so sweet as having a baby sleep on you. I held her for a long time just basking in the absolute joy that I felt holding her. I remembered how I used to YEARN to hold my own child. I would imagine what it felt like to hug my own baby, and that's exactly what I got to do today, what I get to do everyday. She wants me. I give her comfort and peace and rest. I can’t believe how wonderful that feels.
As I pondered those feelings, I thought, “That’s what God wants of us.” He delights in giving us comfort and rest and peace.
And yet, I don’t go to him for it.
It would break my heart if Daisy didn’t come to me for those things. I feel on top of the world when I comfort her. It would/will be so hard when she doesn’t want me, when she struggles to get out of my arms. I know that it’ll come, because independence has to come, but for now I really really love her dependence on me.
And I need to acknowledge my dependence on God.
Being a parent rocks my world, my worldview, and my understanding of God.